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I did it again ANOTHER new piercing! Hellooo snakebites! XD
Visions and Confessions

I can't sleep. Every time I close my eyes I see visions of Catherine being chased down a dark alley way, being tackled to the ground and stabbed repeatedly by a hooded figure. I can literally hear her sharp, pained screams of terror that jolt me awake every time I'm beginning to doze off. I've been on tenterhooks ever since I learned of the incident. They hope she'll wake soon. I hope so too. I contemplated visiting her but I really didn't want the "this is your fault", lectures and stares again. Work was already a killer with the glares and whispers behind my back.

God.

Why would Jeff do this when he knows Catherine is my friend? He knows I care for her, he saw how angry I got with him when she got stabbed the first time round and I believed it was his doing. Its part of the reason, bar loving him, I stay on his good side. He knows my friends. My family. The people I love. The people I hate. Scary to think, he could crush everything I have, destroy them, take them away from me. He knows who I'd miss and who I wouldn't. He's never hurt anyone I care about before. He has threatened but those were just to annoy me. He didn't mean it. Not really. But now...

Okay. Take it easy, Laura. Let's not blow this out of proportion. Maybe it wasn't Jeff. I mean come on, it's not like Jeff owns the only knife and white hoodie in the world. I don't even know if the attacked even had a white hoodie on. It could have been anyone. A drug user. A robber. A psycho. What reason could Jeff possibly have to do this to my friend...?

Unless...

This wasn't some kind of...revenge act, was it? For that little mishap the other night, when Jeff about attacked me. He didn't do it which I'm grateful for but as a sinister punishment did he savagely attack my friend? Intending to kill her or not, not important. Was it to teach me a lesson in respect?

Oh God no. No, I can't cope with that. I promised myself that no one I love and care about would ever get hurt or caught up in any of this with me and Jeff. It's not fair and it's not right. I can't let this lie. I need to ask Jeff why he did this and I need to beg him to stop. It can't go on.

How the Hell am I going to convince him? How am I going to get him to listen to me? He won't do as I ask. He doesn't have to and I can't make him. Damn it, Jeff. Damn it, love. Why do both of them have to be so complicated? Why cant it be simple like in movies?

Oh Catherine. I hope you'll be okay.  I'm so sorry for this.

Jeff.

Jeff...what's happening to you?

Jeff's POV

So I heard from the great vine some important news. Turns out that broad I took the knife to the other night is too an employer of little Laura's work place. How ironic can you get? Hm what's her name? Catherine I think I hear them say? Laura's never mentioned her before. She can't be too much of a friend or Laura would be looking for me and whining in my ear right this minute.

She's alive.

The broad actually survived. Well kind of. Coma I think they said. 50-50 chance of dying. I don't like those odds. See, when I do a job I expect it to be completed and done with no fault, no delay, no errors. It reflects poorly on me. Hell, I have a reputation to hold here. Can't go making mistakes and messing that up now, can I?

I take my trusted knife out and stare at the blood stained blade, gently running my finger down its sharp edge and grinning wildly at the pale face reflected back.

"Time to pay Catherine a visit."
The Bloody End Chapter 17
So it was Jeff after all and now looks like he wants to finish the job! Can anyone stop him? O_O

Next: Hopefully soon
Prev: The Bloody End Chapter 16
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My Battle Scars by littleangellaura1
My Battle Scars
I wanted to share this because I want to raise awareness to Self-harming. I know its way past the month but who says that we cant raise awareness all the time? It is a serious thing, it can grow into and addiction and sometimes can lead to worse consequences. Im sorry to show my horrible marks but I just wanted to let people out there know they are not alone. I'm usually seen as a happy, hyper, go-lucky person but this is to show that even those who smile and laugh everyday, can suffer too. I don't quite know why I do this now and I am determined to stop it will just take time. If anyone ever wants to talk feel free to leave a comment or send me a note and I will reply as soon as I can :) I'm here to help anyone :) I don't judge! I call these my Battle Scars because of the constant battle I go through with the demons in my head to stop.

PS. I was never trying to kill myself, hence why most of the scars are on the top of my arm and the ones on my wrist are light.


PPS. Ignore the cot in the background XD It's my Nephew's when he comes to stay. Don't worry I would NEVER cut while I'm looking after him or when he's present!

Stay strong guys <3
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I feel like I have to make this journal entry to explain myself, but first I want to start by saying I'm sorry. I'm sorry about my unactivity lately, I'm sorry I've been distant towards my friends here on DA and I'm sorry for my ignorance. 

Some of you know that I have an Anxiety disorder, GAD. Well, it's gotten a lot worse over these past few months. I tried to ignore it but that was the stupidest thing to do because it built up and up and up. I went to the Doctor and now I've been diagnosed with Depression. And, they cant give a diagnoses yet, but I was showing symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder. I'll explain more about what that is if I am diagnosed. 

I've just had a really tough time recently guys. I'll be honest with you, I've been having a problem with alcohol abuse and self harming. Some nights I'd sit and drink vodka to myself, getting drunk because I thought it'd take the pain away but it didn't. And then I went back to doing something I did ages ago and swore I wouldn't do again. I've been cutting. I thought it was a one off but now I keep doing it nearly everyday. It's starting to become an addiction and I'm trying to fight it. I want to because I'm desperate to get a tattoo to cover the scars (My first tattoo XD Scared!) 

I've hardly been on DA recently because I just didn't feel up to it and I feel bad because I've stopped talking to my close friends here on DA and especially now learning one of them has been going through just as much as me, I feel worse because I wasn't there for her. Things will change. I'm going to be here as often as I can. I'm not going to let this stupid emotion rollercoaster destroy me!

My "The Bloody End" story IS still on going, I haven't had a writer's block or anything. I just want to feel better so I can write a decent chapter and nothing terrible. I want you guys to enjoy this story :P

Thanks for reading this and again I'm sorry.

Love you guys :D

Laura. ;)
  • Mood: Pity
  • Listening to: WWE theme music
  • Reading: "Secrets" by Jacqueline Wilson
  • Watching: N/n
  • Playing: Played GTA5 earlier
  • Eating: BN biscuits
  • Drinking: Water
The Blame Game

My POV

Urgh. Why do I drink? My head's pounding, I've had to the run to the loo about 10 times this morning and the worst part is I'm working today. Why oh why did I ever agree to go out drinking the night before work? I feel like I'm in a circle of Hell! I'd love to phone in sick but my parents wouldn't let me do it. They always say it's my own doing, it's self inflicted. I know, I know.

God I think I'm going to puke.

Death seems a pretty good alternative for me today. Jeff, if you're stopping by at all, feel free to plunge your knife in me. Might take away some of the pain. I haven't even followed my morning routine which consists of checking the morning news to hear of any deaths likely involving Jeff. I've spent it all in bed feeling sorry for myself. Leah has been texting, surprise surprise she's fresh as a daisy and alright. She never gets hangovers. Catherine hasn't text me once, even though I sent one this morning asking how she was. Maybe she's too busy sleeping away her sorrows too. Well at least I'll have someone to relate to at work today.

I try a bit of toast and that's all I have before leaving. A full cooked meal is out of the question. Oh God. I pray Derek takes pity on us today.

I know a few people from work were out too and luckily everyone else looks pale, miserable, tired. All fellow hangover sufferers. No one is smiling and everyone has dead eyes. Even Gary who usually smiles and winks no matter how he's feeling but today he doesn't even look like he's taken the time to gel his hair.

"Hi, Gary", I say, smiling weakly.

He gives a half-hearted smile and his mouth droops again, looking at the ground. God he must be taken it bad today. Probably had more alcohol than me.

"Feeling rough?", I ask.

"Yeah."

"Me too."

Awkward silence. I give up trying to make conversation. I walk over to the bar (world's worst place to be...I don't want to look at another Vodka bottle again!) to moan to Catherine but she isn't there. Running late I imagine. Or puking in the toilet.

"Ah, Laura. You're here."

Uh oh, Derek's arrived. Well I'm in for it now. I look as pale and gloomy as the rest. I stink of last night's booze and I'm close to puking again. Time for the lecture.

"Sorry I'm late. Bit ill you see."

"Yes. Well. You're on bar duty tonight."

"Oh. Okay."

Silence. Derek looks grim. I look at him. I look at Gary. I look at everyone. They're not hungover like me.

Something's wrong.

"What's going on?"

"You haven't heard, have you?"

I blink. Gary looks over at me with a sad, sympathetic look on his face. A few customers whisper to each other, gazing in my direction. Derek glances behind the bar and I follow his stare. He's looking at the place my fellow work mate would normally be standing. Where she would be smiling gleefully at us all or laughing so loudly we'd have to tell her to be quiet for the 5th time over.

"Where's Catherine?"

"Ah. So you haven't heard."

"Heard what? What's going on? Has something happened?"

Derek sighs and blinks for a few moments, as if trying to hold back tears. Then he looks up at me, a serious look on his face.

"Catherine was attacked last night."

"What?!"

"She was found in an alley way. The doctors think she's been stabbed and beaten. She's in the hospital now...fighting for her life as we speak."

Now it all makes sense. That's why everyone's been so down. Catherine is the shining light of this place. She's always smiling, so bubbly, so full of life. She's friend's with everyone, even Derek and though he will never admit it, he has taken a shine to her. Almost as if she were his daughter. The once joyous, beautiful, loud girl is now laying in a hospital bed. In a coma. Fighting for her life.

Again.

Only this time it's worse. Only this time it was by a different person. Only this time... this person makes sure he doesn't fail like he has done before.

I feel sick, not from the hangover but with grief. My head hurts, not from the hangover, but because of the millions of questions and images running through my head. I feel dizzy, not from the hangover, because I'm just so confused I can't think straight. I realise I've not said a word to Derek after her told me. He's just looking at me miserably, waiting on a response.

"N-no", I choke out. "No way. We were together, the three of us. We were okay. She was fine!"

"They said she was walking home. Alone."

He suddenly looks tense, like he's trying to keep in a dark fury aimed at me. I then realise everything has gone quiet around us. Everyone has stopped what they're doing and peering over at us, even some of the customers. It's only just opening hours and there are only about 6 but its enough to start gossip and rumours. These old bats have nothing better to do.

"I tried to get her into a Taxi with us. I offered to walk her home but she wasn't having any of it. I knew it wasn't safe!"

"But you still let her go all alone."

"Yeah but-"

"You should have tried harder."

I stop, feeling a gnawing pain in my stomach and a lump in my throat. I know I should be more respectful but I can't handle the way this is going. I stare into Derek's tense eyes.

"Are you....blaming me for this?"

Derek doesn't answer. I don't go begging for a response because I know I don't want to hear it as I know what it'll be. I look at Gary. I look at Iris, Lydia, all my fellow workmates. They're looking at me. They're all staring. They're all whispering. They all agree. I'm to blame.

It's my fault.

"You better go behind the bar. You have a customer", Derek grumbles, and walks away. Everyone else goes back to their jobs, talking amongst themselves. The customers are all whispering and glancing over at me repeatedly. It's making me shake with anger. I want to yell at them but I can't. I'm trying hard to fight the rage growing inside me but by doing so, it's making it even more difficult to fight the tears.

"Uh, excuse me?"

I turn to face the customer at the bar, a gent in his mid forties looking harmless and concerned. I wipe my tears furiously and give him a brave grin.

"Sorry. Can I help you?"

I serve his beer and waits till he sits back down before turning my back on everyone, taking deep breaths to calm down. I don't want to face them I don't want to face anyone. I don't want to face the world. But what's behind me? Only enough alcohol to set my mind racing to last night. Everything was going well. We were having fun. FUCK. Why didn't I just walk with Catherine? Why didn't I just convince her to get into the taxi after all?! I wish I could rewind back to last night. Change everything that happened. Then I remember one more thing. One thing I saw just for a split second before entering the Taxi. Before getting inside of it and going away. What I saw just hiding round the corner but I dismissed it as nothing...

Oh God.

I suddenly sprint from behind the bar, sliding past a few customers and into the bathroom where I vomit into the toilet. I don't bother locking the door but I don't care. No one is here anyway. No one would help me. Everyone thinks this is my fault.

I sob weakly, clutching the toilet seat, hitting the wall of the cubicle with my fist, not caring if I damage the wall or myself. I can't blame them for thinking this. They are right. It is my fault.

Catherine could die and it's all my fault.

And not because I didn't escort her home or make her get a Taxi. No. It's because I know.

I know who did this to her.

And.

And I...

I can't say anything about it.

And let him get away with putting both of us through this pain.
The Bloody End Chapter 16
So this time it's Jeff's turn to attack Catherine and leave her for dead. But can Catherine survive another stabbing or is this the end of the road for her? And how will I be able to live with myself if she were to die at what I believe is my own fault? 

Next: The Bloody End Chapter 17
Prev: The Bloody End Chapter 15
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deviantID

littleangellaura1's Profile Picture
littleangellaura1
Call me "Laul" :)
United Kingdom
Name: Laura
But call me: Laul or Lala :3 (My 2 known nicknames xD )
Age: 20
Birthday: 9th September
Star Sign: Virgo
Birthstone: Sapphire
Eyes: Blue
Hair: Black, mid length and full fringe
Pierced: Earlobes, snakebites, tongue
Nationality: Scottish

Sonic the Hedgehog and Creepypasta fan to the MAX!

10 Facts About Me

1. I've loved Sonic ever since I was 7
2. I'm Pansexual
3. If I didn't have video games, music and art then I think I'd lose the will to live!
4. I'm very tomboy and slightly gothic too
5. My biggest hates are Sushi, Wasps and My Little Pony
6. I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD)
7. I'm a huge fan of horror films - The Conjuring is the scariest film I've seen so far, with Insidious being 2nd xD
8. I'm a huge believer in ghosts, spirits and demons. I'd love to be a paranormal investigator or ghost hunter
9. I've been writing songs ever since I was 14
10. I'll NEVER grow up ;)
Interests
I feel like I have to make this journal entry to explain myself, but first I want to start by saying I'm sorry. I'm sorry about my unactivity lately, I'm sorry I've been distant towards my friends here on DA and I'm sorry for my ignorance. 

Some of you know that I have an Anxiety disorder, GAD. Well, it's gotten a lot worse over these past few months. I tried to ignore it but that was the stupidest thing to do because it built up and up and up. I went to the Doctor and now I've been diagnosed with Depression. And, they cant give a diagnoses yet, but I was showing symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder. I'll explain more about what that is if I am diagnosed. 

I've just had a really tough time recently guys. I'll be honest with you, I've been having a problem with alcohol abuse and self harming. Some nights I'd sit and drink vodka to myself, getting drunk because I thought it'd take the pain away but it didn't. And then I went back to doing something I did ages ago and swore I wouldn't do again. I've been cutting. I thought it was a one off but now I keep doing it nearly everyday. It's starting to become an addiction and I'm trying to fight it. I want to because I'm desperate to get a tattoo to cover the scars (My first tattoo XD Scared!) 

I've hardly been on DA recently because I just didn't feel up to it and I feel bad because I've stopped talking to my close friends here on DA and especially now learning one of them has been going through just as much as me, I feel worse because I wasn't there for her. Things will change. I'm going to be here as often as I can. I'm not going to let this stupid emotion rollercoaster destroy me!

My "The Bloody End" story IS still on going, I haven't had a writer's block or anything. I just want to feel better so I can write a decent chapter and nothing terrible. I want you guys to enjoy this story :P

Thanks for reading this and again I'm sorry.

Love you guys :D

Laura. ;)
  • Mood: Pity
  • Listening to: WWE theme music
  • Reading: "Secrets" by Jacqueline Wilson
  • Watching: N/n
  • Playing: Played GTA5 earlier
  • Eating: BN biscuits
  • Drinking: Water

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:icondynamiteboom12345:
Dynamiteboom12345 Featured By Owner Aug 10, 2014
Thanks for the fave!
Reply
:iconlittleangellaura1:
littleangellaura1 Featured By Owner Aug 11, 2014
You're welcome :)
Reply
:iconcrazysob53:
CrazySOB53 Featured By Owner Jul 19, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
*is driving by in a coil voltic* TICKY BOMB! *throws a sticky bomb at you*
Reply
:iconlittleangellaura1:
littleangellaura1 Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2014
O_O HOLY SHI-*sprints* WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!
Reply
:iconcrazysob53:
CrazySOB53 Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
For not bein' a boss!!!

You didn't get the jacksepticeye reference, did you? -3-
Reply
:iconlittleangellaura1:
littleangellaura1 Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2014
I do XD But you cant throw bombs at me!! I have food!!! O_O
Reply
(1 Reply)
:icontheshaver:
theshaver Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2014
you are beautiful
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:iconlittleangellaura1:
littleangellaura1 Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2014
Aww thank you :D O///O
Reply
:iconcrazysob53:
CrazySOB53 Featured By Owner Jun 26, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
I swear, I've been watching waaaaaaaaaaaaay too much Markiplier... .-.
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